Watching our older loved ones age is both heartbreaking and exhausting. Whether it’s a spouse, parent, or friend, as a caregiver, it’s hard to balance personal emotions about what our loved one is experiencing with our own views on those same experiences in terms of how they affect our lives, too.
It’s likely we’ve entered the caregiving journey out of love and respect for the senior in our care; we want the best for them! And no matter what happens, what changes and new challenges arise along the way, that love doesn’t change. But one cannot caregive on love alone.
Exhaustion, frustration, guilt, remorse, impatience—it’s first and of utmost importance to recognize that every single one of those feelings are normal. It’s all normal. Every single emotion on the caregiving roller coaster. You are not the first person to be in this position, and therefore, it’s heartening to know, you are not alone.
Chances are we don’t have all the answers! Knowing when to ask for help is a huge part of caregiving. From researching with professionals to employing them to assist with health matters, as well as recognizing if you need someone to talk to yourself to help ease the burden on mind and spirit; knowing you’re not alone can be a wonderful gift that benefits both you, and the senior loved one in your care. If you have someone to talk to, chances are less likely you’ll “take out your frustrations” on the loved one in your care because you’ll have a safe outlet for those emotions.
Perhaps it’s a matter of giving you both a break. Respite Stays are a revitalizing tool, giving you a mental and physical “vacation” while offering the senior in your care socialization and life enrichment opportunities. Respite Stays are also a great option post-illness or during surgery recovery to ensure professional help is on hand 24-7 for your loved one.
And when it comes time to visit more permanent professionally-supported living options, knowledge is your best tool for a smooth process. Arm yourself with the right information, like our tips for how to have the conversation about moving into a retirement residence, to help smooth over the harsh realization that life is about to change.
We have two comprehensive guides on our Verve Senior Living website to understanding how to make the most out of retirement living: one for yourself, and one for your loved one. Use these guides to help plan, prepare, and make some of the most important decisions for both your futures!
At the end of the day: have patience and grace with yourself. It’s never going to be perfect, and that’s okay. In fact, that’s the beauty of the journey. No two are exactly alike, and in those differences, we find our own brand of “perfection”.
Even incorporating mindful living practices into your routine can help with the daily ins and outs of the caregiving journey. Everything from journaling to meditation and practicing gratitude can help foster a positive spirit that empowers you with patience and makes you better equipped to act and care for others from a place of love.
